'ka wun'..that's how she called me.

To be honest, i consider myself to be very lucky. I never had any stroms or major hardship in my life (apart from the endless exams that streesed me like hell. However, at the begining of 2009, it came. My grandma passed away.

My grandma is nothing like an ordinary grandma. Since i was young, Jia Li and i used to goto Kertih and visited grandma and had fun with da ke, er ke and Jia Yi. Sometimes, they came to kb and visited us too. We used to wake up early in the morning and cycled, while grandma was practicing her tai-chi. I still remember how we pleaded grandma to teach us tai-chi but ended up we made fun of it. Well, we were just a kid at that time. oh yea, she enjoyed planting fruits. Till now, i still mesmerising her papaya.

However, uncle's family encountered an awful accident in 2003, if i'm not mistaken. Grandma's hand was broken and since then, she was suffering the pain as a result of the damage in her nervous system. She was crying almost every night. It was more than heart- wrenching seeing her suffering like this. I'm not pretending to be wise, but you never know how bad i wished that i'm the one who suffered the pain. After that accident, the time we had together was waning of cause, since she couldn't came to kb so frequently. I still remember the time when we talked thru phone and she told me that she told her neighbour that she was very happy to have a very good granchild in kb who cared about her and phoned her everytime. However, every conversation couldn't be very long because of the pain.

Lucky for me, grandma came to kb in 2006, when i just finished my pmr. I followed and accompanied her whenever she went, to our relative house, to meet her old friends, to the chang sheng xue. At that period, i really enjoyed spending times with her. She told me many things including her past, the awful days of the second world war, my dad's, my uncle's and my aunt's childhood, including their lovelifes! That was the time when i spent most of the time with her.

I still vividly remembered that night where dad came to me with a frantic face. He said that we had to goto kl asap coz grandma was hospitalised. When i saw her in the hospital, i was stunned. She was so so thin and had to depend on the oxygen mask. I cried. I went to the hospital everyday to take care of her. Sometimes i had to overnight in the hospital to make sure that she's okay. However, her situatuion was deteriorating and had to go for an operation where the chance was only 50-50. I was so so worried and all of us cried so badly but we had still forced ourselves to smile and said 'everything is gonna be alright' to granny so that she's not scared of the surgery. Well, luckly, she made it. After few nights in the ICU, she had moved to the normal rooms. I was very happy for the first time and started to think on the bright side. The night of 20 th May, i acompanied her overnight in the hospital. She looked into my eyes and started murmuring. I could see that she was trying very hard to tell me something.But i couldn't understand a word as it was too blurry. I kept on persuading her not to talk first and sget some rest as she was too tired and sleepy and told her to tell me in the morning. The next morning, the doctor said that grandma was getting better and we could feed her food like porridge. The nurse even taught me how to feed her milk via the tubes as she said we had to do it everyday onwards. About 12 p.m, i left the hospital and had some rest in my uncle's house. 'Jia Wen, wake up and get dressed quickly!!' er ke woke me up and shouted. I was puzzled and asked him why. Then, he delivered me the last news that i wanted to hear-my granma had passed away.

Jia Yi and I were crying sliently on the way to the hospital. When i saw my grandma, the mixed feeling was totally undescribable. She was not the same when i last seeing her. She was not answering me like she usually did when i called her. I can't continue to write and think back all the things that happened next. I missed her so so badly and i really wanted to know what she wanted to tell me that night. Anyway, i think that i'm blessed that i'm beside her on her last night in this world. Granma, i just want to say that i will miss u and love you always. I will become a person that you'll be proud of and happy for me high up from the heaven.